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One Day I'll Grow Up and Be a Beautiful Woman

A Mother's Story

Read by Abi Maxwell
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A fiery, heartbreaking, riveting memoir that follows one New Hampshire family over the course of three years, unspooling a story of gender identity, class, trans youth, and a child caught in the riptide of America’s culture wars

        Abi Maxwell grew up in rural New Hampshire, one of eight kids in a poor town abutting a wealthier lakeside village. As a young couple, Maxwell and her husband planned not to have kids, but when Maxwell became pregnant, she knew she wanted to raise her child near the mountains and lake of her youth. When her six-year-old, who was known to the world as a boy, asks to wear pink sneakers, asks to be a witch for Halloween, asks to wear a girl’s dance costume, Abi worries about how their small community will react. But when that child changes her name, grows her hair long, and announces that she is a girl, a firestorm engulfs the family.
        Weaving together the story of her own youth, marked by long afternoons skiing the mountains, a cottage on the lake, and a proud gay brother, but also by neglect and bullying that pushed her brother to the brink, Abi Maxwell contends with the rural America where she was raised and, years later, where she is now raising her daughter, as lawmakers nationwide push to erase the very existence of trans youth. Intimate and stirring, this book is essential reading for this moment in our history.
“Abi Maxwell’s One Day I’ll Grow Up and Be a Beautiful Woman is a cluster bomb of a memoir lobbed from the front lines of the transgender rights movement right into the heart of the contemporary culture wars.”
—Alexandra Fuller, The New York Times

“Stirring and fierce, righteous and right, One Day I’ll Grow Up and Be a Beautiful Woman is powerfully written, elegantly constructed, and unfailingly wise. Abi Maxwell’s memoir is equal parts furious and hopeful, outrageous and familiar, harrowing and heartening, timely and timeless. It is a story that pits a small town and the small minds who dominate it against the powers of mother love, familial support, and an inspiring refusal to give up or give in.” 
—Laurie Frankel, New York Times bestselling author of This Is How It Always Is

"One Day I’ll Grow Up and Be a Beautiful Woman is an extraordinary story about love, selfhood, and belonging, and what parents will do to protect their child in a place that is unwilling to protect her. The answer, of course, is anything and everything, forever. There are so many families who need the righteous fury, compassion, and hope they'll find in this book."
—Maggie Smith, New York Times bestselling author of You Could Make This Place Beautiful

"Abi Maxwell's searing and tender memoir is the best kind of narrative for right nowdeeply engaged in a place not all Americans might know, fiercely engaged in reminding readers that love is love, blood is blood, family is family, and for so many of us women and mothers, the intricate web of loyalty is what truly matters." 
—Susan Straight, author of In the Country of Women

"This book is a compelling and visceral portrayal of a mother’s pain, joy, hope, and heartbreak as she fights for her daughter’s right to safely be herself. As a parent of a transgender child and as an advocate, I am deeply grateful for Abi Maxwell’s vulnerability and honesty in sharing what too many families across the country are facing in these turbulent times. I can only hope readers allow themselves to be transformed by the humanity laid bare in these pages for the sake of generations to come."
—Jamie Bruesehoff, author of Raising Kids Beyond the Binary
© Kate Criscone
ABI MAXWELL is the author of the novels Lake People and The Den. After graduating from the writing program at the University of Montana, she spent many years working in public libraries, and she now works as a high school librarian. She is a dedicated advocate for the rights of transgender youth in her state and frequently testifies in front of the legislature on their behalf. View titles by Abi Maxwell

About

A fiery, heartbreaking, riveting memoir that follows one New Hampshire family over the course of three years, unspooling a story of gender identity, class, trans youth, and a child caught in the riptide of America’s culture wars

        Abi Maxwell grew up in rural New Hampshire, one of eight kids in a poor town abutting a wealthier lakeside village. As a young couple, Maxwell and her husband planned not to have kids, but when Maxwell became pregnant, she knew she wanted to raise her child near the mountains and lake of her youth. When her six-year-old, who was known to the world as a boy, asks to wear pink sneakers, asks to be a witch for Halloween, asks to wear a girl’s dance costume, Abi worries about how their small community will react. But when that child changes her name, grows her hair long, and announces that she is a girl, a firestorm engulfs the family.
        Weaving together the story of her own youth, marked by long afternoons skiing the mountains, a cottage on the lake, and a proud gay brother, but also by neglect and bullying that pushed her brother to the brink, Abi Maxwell contends with the rural America where she was raised and, years later, where she is now raising her daughter, as lawmakers nationwide push to erase the very existence of trans youth. Intimate and stirring, this book is essential reading for this moment in our history.

Reviews

“Abi Maxwell’s One Day I’ll Grow Up and Be a Beautiful Woman is a cluster bomb of a memoir lobbed from the front lines of the transgender rights movement right into the heart of the contemporary culture wars.”
—Alexandra Fuller, The New York Times

“Stirring and fierce, righteous and right, One Day I’ll Grow Up and Be a Beautiful Woman is powerfully written, elegantly constructed, and unfailingly wise. Abi Maxwell’s memoir is equal parts furious and hopeful, outrageous and familiar, harrowing and heartening, timely and timeless. It is a story that pits a small town and the small minds who dominate it against the powers of mother love, familial support, and an inspiring refusal to give up or give in.” 
—Laurie Frankel, New York Times bestselling author of This Is How It Always Is

"One Day I’ll Grow Up and Be a Beautiful Woman is an extraordinary story about love, selfhood, and belonging, and what parents will do to protect their child in a place that is unwilling to protect her. The answer, of course, is anything and everything, forever. There are so many families who need the righteous fury, compassion, and hope they'll find in this book."
—Maggie Smith, New York Times bestselling author of You Could Make This Place Beautiful

"Abi Maxwell's searing and tender memoir is the best kind of narrative for right nowdeeply engaged in a place not all Americans might know, fiercely engaged in reminding readers that love is love, blood is blood, family is family, and for so many of us women and mothers, the intricate web of loyalty is what truly matters." 
—Susan Straight, author of In the Country of Women

"This book is a compelling and visceral portrayal of a mother’s pain, joy, hope, and heartbreak as she fights for her daughter’s right to safely be herself. As a parent of a transgender child and as an advocate, I am deeply grateful for Abi Maxwell’s vulnerability and honesty in sharing what too many families across the country are facing in these turbulent times. I can only hope readers allow themselves to be transformed by the humanity laid bare in these pages for the sake of generations to come."
—Jamie Bruesehoff, author of Raising Kids Beyond the Binary

Author

© Kate Criscone
ABI MAXWELL is the author of the novels Lake People and The Den. After graduating from the writing program at the University of Montana, she spent many years working in public libraries, and she now works as a high school librarian. She is a dedicated advocate for the rights of transgender youth in her state and frequently testifies in front of the legislature on their behalf. View titles by Abi Maxwell

Dear Librarians: A Letter from Abi Maxwell, Author of One Day I’ll Grow Up and Be a Beautiful Woman

“I work as a high school librarian now. I still celebrate Banned Books Week every year, but it’s different, because I actually understand it. ‘Did you notice that most of these bans are for books with Black or LGBTQ+ characters?’ I ask the students. I tell them to remember that these statistics are only a small fraction of the story; I tell them that most book bans are insidious, as they were in my former town.”

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